Starting off into life in the Spirit is a whole mixed bag of pretty awesome, and pretty intense, emotions.
There’s the excitement over a life full of power and purpose. There is the fear of the uncontrollable nature of what God is going to do. There is the anticipation of seeing miracles and healings and prophecy. There is the joy in finally feeling like your faith is headed back in the right direction and that it might MEAN something again.
So we begin with hope in our hearts and our eyes on progress, usually at 150 miles an hour (or faster if we can manage it). And while this might last for many weeks or months, eventually things slow down. Where you once were devouring Scripture, you start to find other things more interesting. Where prayer had become so life-giving, it now feels like you’re talking to the walls. Where you were begging your body to let you fast longer, your thoughts drift over food like it can save you from mundane bits of life. And after walking through this slowly thickening quicksand long enough, you find yourself at a total standstill.
This, my friends, is what we call The Wall.
It can take many different shapes and sizes, but it usually consists of some sort of avoidance of this new pursuit of the Spirit, rebellion even. We slip back into old patterns of thought and action, the very ones that got us so restless for more of God in the first place, and find our motivation dwindled or totally gone.
This isn’t the only place in life this happens. Think of a new job. Or starting a diet. Or a new hobby. We learn and buy everything we could possibly need for this new endeavor, but sooner or later the shine wears off and we feel the exhaustion that a new pattern of life demands.
The Wall is normal.
We do, however, believe there are some things to look for and some practices to engage in that could make your experience of The Wall less likely to end your newfound journey into the life of the Spirit.
ACTIVATION ENERGY
Any new habit or way of living takes a certain level of activation energy to get it rolling into existence. We know this from chemistry. There is a catalyst, something that causes the reaction to want to take place, and once that catalyst’s presence tips the scales of the energy required to make the transformation take place, the whole process begins. That energy is the activation energy.
You might have started this because your faith felt lifeless. Or because your leadership in the church felt uninspired. Or your newfound role of wife/mother/coworker/employee made you realize you needed more supernatural help than you were currently getting. Whatever it was there was a catalyst, and that created enough activation energy to get the process going and you took off out of the gates with massive excitement and energy to change everything all at once.
And friends, that is GOOD.
We believe God designed us this way, to need a fire lit inside of us to see change happen, and so he uses these catalyst to throw us off kilter and thrust into life change.
Embrace that energy, don’t be ashamed or embarrassed of it.
Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus, who desires you to be conformed to his image and delights in this process. Don’t worry about the doubters or the strange looks from church friends or the whispers of “over-spiritual” and “zealot.” Embrace this first season and find others who will fan this into flame, because God delights in your obedience.
CRUISING
That initial activation energy is so important because not only are you starting to say no to things that became so habitual in the past, you are saying yes to a lot of things that take a lot of willpower to say yes to.
Prayer. Surrender. Fasting. Total obedience. Worship. Control of the tongue. Taking risks in the things of the Spirit. Reading Scripture.
All of this takes effort, and God gives us that initial boost to start these things. And what’s nice is that for a season, you will probably find yourself cruising.
Scientists say that once you say yes to something it becomes easier to say yes the next time, and the next, and the next, until it becomes reflexive and you say yes out of HABIT.
You’ll find this is true for this life in the Spirit. It will be easier to wake up and surrender to the Spirit’s will in your life even before you get out of bed. It will be easier to turn on worship music instead of the radio or an audiobook on the drive to work. It will get easier to open up your bible for your first 15 minutes in the office.
Ride. The. Wave.
Thank God for this season, because it tells us that this CAN be normal. These habits CAN be just that, HABITS. What seemed so impossible before is now looking totally doable, and you’ll probably be seeing the dividends that Scripture talks about, like greater patience and increased kindness, and this odd ability to actually think about others more than you think about yourself.
The Scriptures are proven true in this season! God wasn’t lying! Weird, huh?!
Enjoy it, because soon enough, it comes.
THE WALL
We wish we could say it happened the same way for everyone. That all you have to do is look for a gradual slowdown and recognize it when it comes, and then give you 5 easy steps to go through it.
But we can’t. Sorry.
Sometimes it comes at you out of nowhere, totally blindsided by a lack of desire or willpower.
Sometimes it’s like you’re running through quicksand but didn’t notice it until you were hardly moving and out of breath.
Sometimes you get totally busy in other great areas of life or projects for family or even for God, but you soon realize you can’t remember the last time you prayed for the filling of the Spirit or asked for a word of prophecy or reached out to a traveling companion.
We don’t know what it will look like, but we do know that it will happen.
And when it comes, remember this:
Be Honest
Don’t hide it.
Don’t ignore it.
Don’t try to muscle your way through it.
Acknowledge it. Embrace it. And give it up!
We mean, let it drive you to your knees in surrender to God. Let it reveal your weakness once again (because we all love that so much). Let it turn your gaze to heaven and wait for Him to do something about it.
If we can do this, we will give God the space to move and come through, however long that takes, and be reminded that he is for us and this life in his presence.
Slow Down
Quit running so hard!
That activation energy you had burned off a long time ago, and the resources you might have built up in the past like habits of prayer and scripture reading are depleted, and the adrenaline that took over after that is fizzling out.
Rest.
Let God refill and refresh your cup. Let him pour into you, and quit trying to force it.
You can’t do all the right things to unlock the secrets of getting through the wall. God is not a genie, he is Lord, and he WILL act on your behalf in PERFECT timing.
So sit in front of the wall, remain attentive to his presence and will, and breathe.
Say Yes.
Soon you will begin to feel promptings by the Spirit to make moves. To get on your feet, wipe off your hands, and begin to apply pressure to the wall.
While God is the one with the power to overcome The Wall, he still requires us to participate.
Whether that is to press into this roadblock with prayer practices or memorization of hopeful scriptures or going for walks in the presence of God, or to let him do the heavy lifting and to walk forward into the next thing he has for you, resolve to put one foot in front of the other.
And be comforted. What may seem like small acts of faith are probably some of the biggest and most courageous expressions of your trust in God of your life.
Stay Connected. You cannot do this alone.
We know we talk about this a lot, so we’ll talk about it some more. If anything we’ll get it though our thick skulls while we hope to encourage you, because we need constant reminding if we’re honest.
In every stage of The Wall (Activation Energy, Cruising, Slow Down, and The Wall itself), lean on the people God has given you for this journey.
Do not wait until you hit The Wall to find those people! By then it will still be a resource, but not nearly as effective as if you were traveling with others from the beginning.
All hope is not lost if you find yourself alone or needing more support at this juncture. We are here to help, so please reach out to us and we would love to invest in your journey and help you in this, and every other, season of life in the Spirit.
The Wall is coming for us all.
But we don’t need to fear it. We don’t need to lose hope. We don’t need to give up in defeat.
You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. -1 John 4:4 NIV
God is for you. Press on, and you will receive.
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